Pain is something we all spend a lot of time running away from. It’s the reason that so many have fallen into destructive coping mechanisms or patterns. It may seem extreme, but pain is centered at the root of all our insecurities and fears.
The sting of not believing we can’t make it on our own, loneliness, and withheld affections can drive us to show up to jobs that are unfulfilling. stay in unloving relationships, or cause harm to ourselves.
Today I want to challenge you to look inside and recognize that pain, especially the self inflicted kind.
Step One: Apologize to Yourself
Just because it is customary to say "sorry" to others doesn't mean we should never tell ourselves. Negative self-talk, destructive behaviors, and simply not taking care of yourself all constitute an apology and expressive writing can be an easy first step towards healing.
It can be as simple as a statement (adding specifics where necessary):
I am sorry for hurting you.
I am sorry I have compared you to others.
I am sorry for making you feel _________ about __________.
or a detailed letter expressing regret over a negative view or even wounds created over a lifetime exemplified by this personal letter.